Have you ever been hurt by someone? I mean a hurt that seemed like it wouldn’t go away. It’s very difficult to get over it. Often we try to act like it didn’t hurt very much. Or sometimes we just bury it in our memory thinking it won’t go away. But it eventually surfaces again and the bitter feelings come back. Hurts have the potential to really give us problems if they aren’t dealt with. Let me tell you a story.
When I was in High School I played goalie for our soccer team. One game I received a vicious kick in my stomach that literally flipped me upside down. It wrenched my lower back and it hurt for several days. But I got over it. Advance about 30 years and beginning to have back trouble about once a year. That is, until last Fall. My back went out again and I pushed it until the weekend was over. Monday morning I couldn’t get out of bed. After Judy left for work, I started to have back spasms that were crazy. So I had to call 911 just to get me out of bed. I received some great medication but still couldn’t walk for the next week. When I finally went to the doctor I found out it was because my back had been hurt in High School. Over the years my body had compensated for my injury until it finally got so bad it became a major back ache. I’m better now, but I do not want to go through that again.
You might ask, ‘What does that have to do with people hurting you?’ Well, I find some similarities to the results of my initial back injury and the hurts I receive from others. A Bible verse may begin to explain:
Hebrews 12:15 – “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.”
This verse tells me that I need to be careful that bitterness over a past hurt does not grow to become a major problem in my life. If I don’t deal with my hurts, I will become bitter. It may not show and I may hide it pretty good. But left alone, my hurts will make me bitter and I will have big problems. Often these problems explode in my life in relationships.
So what can a person do to alleviate the hurts and bitterness that want to wreck our life? I found three things that helped my recovery from back injury that parallel what we can do about the hurts that come into our life.
1. Talk to the right person.
My back problem resulted from hiding my hurts. I should have gone to a doctor. Have you ever noticed that the first thing when we get physically hurt is to put our hand over it? Or when we have a bruise, we try to hide it. People are reluctant to admit someone has hurt them. But we need to talk to someone. Talk to the person who hurt you. Talk to Jesus about it. He understands. The worst thing you can do is hide your hurts.
2. Stretch and Strengthen
When I went to the doctor he told me the best course of action to prevent my back problem reoccurring was to stretch and strengthen my back muscles. My physical therapists began to give me exercises to do both of those. I liken this to prayer and Bible study in our Christian life. When people hurt me, the best thing I can do for me is to pray for them. It keeps me from getting bitter. Studying my Bible will help me get God’s heart and perspective on the situation.
3. Get lined up
When I went to my chiropractor, she began to straighten my back. She began with my top vertebrae. She said if it is out of whack, the rest of my body won’t line up correctly. I find that to get my relationships with others right, I need to make sure my relationship with God is right. Matthew 6:30 tells me “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.”
So those are just a few things to help you deal with the hurts that happen to you. Some hurts can’t be avoided. But we can make sure the hurts don’t have any lingering effects.
What hurts have you endured in your life?
What have you done to help you get over the hurts?
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