I talked about marriage in my sermon on Sunday. I think marriage is the most rewarding and difficult relationship a person can commit to. Throughout my marriage to Judy we have experienced the ‘thrill of victory’ and the ‘agony of defeat.’
It seems there are so many things in society trying to tear marriages apart. Yet, God, and most married couples, want to stay together.
What are some things a person could do to improve a marriage? I discovered five ‘nails’ that can hold a marriage together in Ephesians 5:15-33.
1) Be Spirit-Controlled completely.
Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, (Ephesians 5:18)
Paul associated being ‘filled with the Spirit’ to being ‘drunk with wine.’ To be drunk means more than to drink. It means to be under the control, the influence, of alcohol. To be filled with the Spirit means, letting the Spirit of God lead you, empower you, control you, and influence you, completely, continually! Something is going to control you! Make sure you let God be the One!
2) Speak to one another with care.
Speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord (Ephesians 5:19)
To speak to each other in song means your conversation bring harmony and melody to your relationship. Your words will be positive, uplifting, and communicating joy! This is constructive communication. “Speaking” not yelling! One of the top causes to a breakdown in a marriage relationship is the lack of communication or negative communication. Say nice things!
3) Submit to one another mutually.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. … Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:21-22, 25)
Though some people can’t get past the idea of a wife’s submission, our first submission is to be to Jesus Christ! Submission in marriage, is an act of submission and respect for Jesus Christ, not an issue of rights or privileges. A wife shows her submission to Jesus by submitting to her husband and a husband shows his submission by loving his wife.
4) Sacrifice willingly.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. (Ephesians 5:25, 28)
Jesus is our example. He sacrificed Himself for His bride. Though husbands are encouraged to sacrifice for their wives, both partners in marriage are to give & sacrifice! The attitude is that of Christ who gave His all for us! Marriage is never 50/50, but 110/110!
5) Serve Unselfishly.
He that loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord the church. (Ephesians 5:28,29)
We are to nourish and cherish one another. Nourish is to care for and to provide sustenance. Cherish is to treat with affection and tenderness. The idea here is to be like Jesus & seek to serve, not be served! That’s what you did when you were dating. Never stop caring for serving and caring for one another. Put each other first.
Loving means you care more for that other person than you care about yourself! To love, honor & cherish means you want to make that other person’s life better! Is there any greater pursuit, than that? To improve another person’s life & eternity!
I hope these help hold your marriage together.
You can read some of my other articles about marriage: The Best Guarantee for a Happy Marriage, Marriage According to Kids, The Best Marriage Advice I Ever Got On Marriage.