The movie, Monsters University, is about a young monster who went to college and tried to fit in.  It’s the age-old story of trying to find friends in a new place. Have you ever been in a new environment – surrounded by people but feeling all alone? Then you know how he felt. By the end of the movie, Mike and Sulley are inseparable friends.

Everyone wants a true friend. A person who really understands us and who sticks with us.  The Bible tells us that if we want to have friends, we’ve got to be friendly. That’s what I want to talk about and use a real example in the Bible – a guy who was so friendly he earned the nickname ‘Encourager.’  (King James translates him as ‘son of consolation.’ Others translate this as ‘son of Encouragement.’ The Greek root word is paraclete, which is the same word used by Jesus to describe the Holy Spirit.) The life of Barnabas is a great example of what it means to be a friend to others. What was it about his life that earned him that friendly nickname?

A Friend Sacrifices for Others

“And Joses, who by the apostles was surnamed Barnabas, (which is, being interpreted, The son of consolation,) a Levite, and of the country of Cyprus, Having land, sold it, and brought the money, and laid it at the apostles’ feet.” (Acts 4:36-37)

Barnabas sold his property and gave the money to the church to care for the poor members.  That’s literally putting your money where your mouth is. It’s one thing to say you love someone. It’s another to actually sacrifice to prove it. This is the foundation of what it means to be a real friend. A real friend helps even when it comes at great personal cost.

I think of Jason Dunham. He received the Medal of Honor for risking his life in Iraq. This is the report of his actions on April, 14, 2004:

Corporal Dunham’s squad was conducting a reconnaissance mission in the town of Karabilah, Iraq, when they heard rocket-propelled grenade and small arms fire erupt approximately two kilometers to the west. Corporal Dunham led his Combined Anti-Armor Team towards the engagement to provide fire support to their Battalion Commander’s convoy, which had been ambushed as it was traveling to Camp Husaybah. As Corporal Dunham and his Marines advanced, they quickly began to receive enemy fire. Corporal Dunham ordered his squad to dismount their vehicles and led one of his fire teams on foot several blocks south of the ambushed convoy. Discovering seven Iraqi vehicles in a column attempting to depart, Corporal Dunham and his team stopped the vehicles to search them for weapons. As they approached the vehicles, an insurgent leaped out and attacked Corporal Dunham. Corporal Dunham wrestled the insurgent to the ground and in the ensuing struggle saw the insurgent release a grenade. Corporal Dunham immediately alerted his fellow Marines to the threat. Aware of the imminent danger and without hesitation, Corporal Dunham covered the grenade with his helmet and body, bearing the brunt of the explosion and shielding his Marines from the blast. In an ultimate and selfless act of bravery in which he was mortally wounded, he saved the lives of at least two fellow Marines. By his undaunted courage, intrepid fighting spirit, and unwavering devotion to duty, Corporal Dunham gallantly gave his life for his country, thereby reflecting great credit upon himself and upholding the highest traditions of the Marine Corps and the United States Naval Service.”

 A Friend Seeks the Best in Others

“And when Saul was come to Jerusalem, he assayed to join himself to the disciples: but they were all afraid of him, and believed not that he was a disciple. But Barnabas took him, and brought him to the apostles, and declared unto them how he had seen the Lord in the way, and that he had spoken to him, and how he had preached boldly at Damascus in the name of Jesus.” (Acts 9:26-27)

A man named Saul had experienced a radical conversion. The man that persecuted and executed Christians had now become a Christian himself.  But he was having trouble convincing the other disciples. But Barnabas, the encourager, takes him by the hand and brings him to the leaders and says let me tell you about the change in my brother Saul. A real friend sees good in us that others can’t. They encourage others by saying, “I believe in you.”

There are two statues in Washington D.C. that together tell a remarkable story. One is the massive memorial to General Ulysses S. Grant that stands at the east end of the Reflecting Pool, literally in the morning shadow of the U. S. Capitol building. Visitors can hardly miss this majestic depiction of the legendary general atop his war stallion. Grant’s military leadership was decisive to the Union’s victory in the Civil War.  Some 2 1/2 miles away, in a pleasant city park, stands a more simple memorial. The statue of this lesser-known Civil War figure, Major General John Rawlins, has actually had eight different locations and is hardly ever noticed by visitors. Rawlins had been a lawyer in Galena, Illinois, where Grant lived just prior to the war, and he became Grant’s chief of staff. Rawlins knew Grant’s character flaws, especially his weakness for alcohol. At the beginning of the war, Rawlins extracted a pledge from Grant to abstain from drunkenness, and when the general threatened to fall away from that promise, his friend would plead with him and support him until Grant could get back on track. In many ways, it was Rawlins who stood beside the seemingly solitary figure of Grant the great general. Rawlins’ memorial is modest compared to the mounted glory afforded Grant, yet without his unheralded love and support, Grant would hardly have managed even to climb into the saddle.

You can view 3 more qualities of a friend at 3 Qualities of a Real Friend.

Are you a ‘Barnabas’ kind of friend? Do you sacrifice for others? Do you seek the best for others?

Jesus is your best friend!  He made His life a sacrifice for you! And He wants the best in you and believes in you!

What qualities do you look for in a friend?  What kind of friend do you want to be?